Why Bother?
1. Religion: Through my study of anthropology, biology, the sciences, rationalism, history , prehistory (archaeology) and my life experiences, as I approach 30, I can calmly say there is no god or no point. The worlds religions are moral fables loosely tied to actual historical events that are embellished with unrealistic stories. The idea that a flood that one might be able to prove, is exaggerated and then given a moral purpose as the hand of a god, is just one of many examples. It is a trick employed so that when questioned they can point and say, but this battle did take place, and some flood did take place, so the rest MUST BE TRUE!
The fact that thousands or religions have existed, everywhere around the world and have very similar tenets and style, yet not one is proven, is the main proof they are not real. In the age of cameras, computers, and recordable devices, and history, it is still shocking that religion is on the rise, yet zero proof exists. The only proof offered is that of the stories of the past, that through history can be countered. So if any of the worlds big three religions, Judaism, Christianity or Islam, have an issue, I ask all three this, why does no one believe in the Greek Gods anymore? Because for a long time, people did, or the Egyptians? Because none of them are true. I have not seen any act of god, and by the irrational misery that is heaped on man, no supreme being is watching over us and as culture dictates shifting morals and norms, there seems to be no standard, meaning no point. One persons rape or murder is justified somewhere, at some time. There is always Three. One being what I will call blank White. Two being what I will called Pitch Black. Without opposites neither can exist. Existence requires two to justify the one. The Middle I will call Grey. The grey is what makes life really, its where our consciousness sits. In between the extremes its what we work in, and that is probably what you can call life on a very simple basis.
Meaning is what people have put into life since they became very conscious over million years of development. Once basic needs are met to sustain the ongoing chemical reaction that is all life, then one has time for the grey. We fill it now with brainwashing from TV, Newspapers, Institutions, Government and what other people load in our heads to make them or their vision of the world how they would want it, and it is this grey we fight over or succumb too.
On Death: There is no heaven, hell, rebirth or anything. Think back way back, to when you were born. Remember it? No. But you were alive right? So why can't one live without knowing? Like an ant for example.
For animals, we often imagine our favorite ones, dogs and cats for example, because they have a lot of that grey, that personality thing. We domesticated them, met their needs, and bred them, to show to us basic forms of personality, so we like to think if we get to heaven so do our pets, like the Egyptians. Some people take it to a farther extreme and think only humans are worthy of a soul or eternal existence. Still wrong. See we know cats, dogs, and ants, all are sustained chemical reactions, even trees, ie. Life.
It gets a little weird with virus, chemical reactions broken down so low, they are dormant, until activated...like a seed. Is a see life? Is virus life? Up for debated.
However, if you think of the millions of ants, just in your square mile, now times that by trying to figure out just how many ants, at this time are alive? How many ants have existed over the last million years? So you think each little ant, some suffered, some had good little ant lives, vice versa, would you think some god is going to make sure each and every little ant has a nice afterlife? So in this example, why dogs, why cats, and then why people? There are 8 billion or so people. That is a lot. The majority, are ignorant, just meeting needs, living more in a black or white area of pure existence, very little grey. These beings live and die, very quickly, all the time, without meaning....so what afterlife do they get? Or are we saying only artists, Americans, Europeans, or the rich are worthy of life after death? So its all selective? I think its just random.
The only question is why? And why is it so stable, our brains are remarkable little computers and really create the stability, question is if everything has a meaning, perhaps science is the study of the meaning, maybe the universe is a code. One can not deny that we know not what started it, what things were before, or how we can ever grasp the concept of forever.
Thus I conclude, there may not be life after death, but one can not rule out being born again, because before I was born, for infinity, I never expected to be born again, but I have absolutely no proof I lived before, without memory, living for living is pointless anyways. So if I was an ant, or will be an ant, its just as good as being dead. Seems death and infinity our the natural states of things.
Love: I often quote my anthropology professor to friends that Love is Economic. Well it is. The idea that there is this emotion that will make you happy, day in, day out, til you die, is foolish. The commitment is to prevent jealousy and those things we call feelings (Hormones) that get releases and to keep them balanced on in happy mode. Love is a bond that is economic to maintain a relationship to give people more stuff and security. The more a society has, I would gather, the more you find marriages come and go, plenty of stuff. The less, the more important that marriage is, the stronger the morals, because it means survival. Seem with families, people are more sustainable and safe in groups. This group, individual, bonding thing plays out all over again and again, in nations, sports, and between people. We form teams of friends, family, and lovers, to survive. Its not wonderful, its just something you have to do. But when it goes wrong as I know, it can hurt you very very bad. Maybe it is better not to have loved, and who cares what you lost?
Pointlessness: As I approach 30 I only have the following things in reality to look forward too.
1. I believe not in religion or love having disproved them. Because in reality neither has happened to me just disappointment and hurting others, which is not my intention so better I not have existed.
2. Happiness, is vague, rare, and not sustainable in this existence, we have floods, death, sickness, murder, and we are outnumbered, overpopulated, and killing ourselves, the rationalists can not win, so why bother? You won't impact your government, you have no control. So if you can not control things and you see a train heading for you and you have a gun in your hand, what do you do? Wait for the pain of the train or take the gun and go with the obvious rational truth, less pain same outcome.
3. As I age the family and friends I have, will not be added too. I will not make more true friends, I will not have anymore family you get family at the beginning of the game of life. Now you just watch them age, suffer and die. I have seen a few close relatives die, it was not wonderful, not the type of thing to put a bounce in your step.
4. Me: My mistakes in life, my attempt to be rational in an irrational world where evil does win (there are no referees) has only brought me being used and losses. I am not happy, nor does my money or career give me a sense of reward its just a mark of the mental and physical torture I been too and only looks good compared to the billions who starve. I can only look at dying young from the smoking I took up from stress, my bad eating habits from being picky and stressed, and from my horrendous drinking. So even if things did work out, I will die just like my uncle and aunt did when their lives started to go well again. Cancer and Diabetes run in my family, so when I do get a nice apartment and maybe get to relax, I am sure I will die, because that is what I seen. I didn't see angles, Mohamed or pretty fairies, I saw suffering, and death.
5. What is the point? Millions suffer and starve in North Korea and Zimbabwe because of one man or corrupt few. Yet thousands die quickly in earth quakes or Hunter S. blows his brains out. Yet nobody bats an eye, yet we spend all our time trying to protect dictators, deal with them, or feed and house rapists, murderers and burglars. Why not kill them, let more good live and help the millions? I think its ironic these people live til old age and are protected in life, but innocent people die by the hand of nature, maybe there is a god and maybe hes a fucking bastard like me.
I grew up in a rough area of Brooklyn. At each step I saw originally classes of people and the smart float to the top, the somewhat smart like me go up and down and struggle with a hard work ethic at times or a too smart for my own good self punishment in failure by not doing homework for example, and the majority act like animals, only to somewhat mature and drive buses, work in factories, or end up in jail most likely. After the complete torture of school, herded in away from your family, picked on by the larger more aggressive hominids, and then brain washed into the fairytale land of institutions and to come home to your TV that brainwashed you, you come out of that completely fucked up and ready to be shit on now by the world. Those kids you went to school with are just bigger, more aggressive and all over now in a giant free for all we call life.
I don't see anything good, we are running out of original things in the arts. Its all done, and now we will over populate, our climate is out of control, governments are now fully corrupt, and we sit here waiting for the next great war, plague, or disaster to hit any of us anytime, whether its terrorism or floods, it will happen, its just like waiting for it. I am sure on a ground floor apartment I will get robbed. my apartment was robbed twice as a kid, so yes it does actually happen. Or when I drive, I will run someone over or get crippled in an accident, read the news, it does actually happen every day. These things are Real. Reality is death or pain, with no justice. Expect rapists in the UK to be let out early, expect my manager who does no work but has tactics to kiss ass and look busy to rise to the top, and expect at no point to ever win. Unfortunately I see all this, I have lived all this, and now as I am about to turn 30, my maybe half way point, I think do I want another 30 years of this? I am bored, unemotional, hurt, beat down, and I have given up.
The only problem with all my brains I can find neither Pot to calm me or a gun to blow my brains out, so for now, I chug on, to hurt others, fail, be disappointed anytime I scrounge up some remaining energy to try and just wait for the next horrible thing to happen, I am sure its there, around the corner, when not waiting for a train or trudging at work, it happens on the days when I am off, want to have fun on a vacation, or randomly....its just over there, a death, an accident, another terrorist attack..the question is I can only hope I die, rather than get horrible hurt, in a vegetable state, made deaf or blinded, only to watch the criminal laugh, get away with it, and win. Because read the papers, in reality they do win, and finally, as I summarized above don't expect a shred of justice in the next life or later on, that is a trick to keep you going, keep you sedate and keep you working, so the few evil ones, like the Dick Cheney's and child like Gordon Brown's can keep on laughing, keep on eating and living the life while the billions of us nobodies, suffer, and die. I am only extra work and luck away from being like a child in India building a run down shack in the street with cement blocks, at least they don't know what I know, so i am jealous, jealous they are the ants, and I am the dog beat for pissing on the floor.
The only solace is death, because if this is what I would have to deal with for another hundred years then I really would crazy, which apparently I am anyways to boot.
I leave this blog to say, I have failed, I tried, I am sorry to all....
The fact that thousands or religions have existed, everywhere around the world and have very similar tenets and style, yet not one is proven, is the main proof they are not real. In the age of cameras, computers, and recordable devices, and history, it is still shocking that religion is on the rise, yet zero proof exists. The only proof offered is that of the stories of the past, that through history can be countered. So if any of the worlds big three religions, Judaism, Christianity or Islam, have an issue, I ask all three this, why does no one believe in the Greek Gods anymore? Because for a long time, people did, or the Egyptians? Because none of them are true. I have not seen any act of god, and by the irrational misery that is heaped on man, no supreme being is watching over us and as culture dictates shifting morals and norms, there seems to be no standard, meaning no point. One persons rape or murder is justified somewhere, at some time. There is always Three. One being what I will call blank White. Two being what I will called Pitch Black. Without opposites neither can exist. Existence requires two to justify the one. The Middle I will call Grey. The grey is what makes life really, its where our consciousness sits. In between the extremes its what we work in, and that is probably what you can call life on a very simple basis.
Meaning is what people have put into life since they became very conscious over million years of development. Once basic needs are met to sustain the ongoing chemical reaction that is all life, then one has time for the grey. We fill it now with brainwashing from TV, Newspapers, Institutions, Government and what other people load in our heads to make them or their vision of the world how they would want it, and it is this grey we fight over or succumb too.
On Death: There is no heaven, hell, rebirth or anything. Think back way back, to when you were born. Remember it? No. But you were alive right? So why can't one live without knowing? Like an ant for example.
For animals, we often imagine our favorite ones, dogs and cats for example, because they have a lot of that grey, that personality thing. We domesticated them, met their needs, and bred them, to show to us basic forms of personality, so we like to think if we get to heaven so do our pets, like the Egyptians. Some people take it to a farther extreme and think only humans are worthy of a soul or eternal existence. Still wrong. See we know cats, dogs, and ants, all are sustained chemical reactions, even trees, ie. Life.
It gets a little weird with virus, chemical reactions broken down so low, they are dormant, until activated...like a seed. Is a see life? Is virus life? Up for debated.
However, if you think of the millions of ants, just in your square mile, now times that by trying to figure out just how many ants, at this time are alive? How many ants have existed over the last million years? So you think each little ant, some suffered, some had good little ant lives, vice versa, would you think some god is going to make sure each and every little ant has a nice afterlife? So in this example, why dogs, why cats, and then why people? There are 8 billion or so people. That is a lot. The majority, are ignorant, just meeting needs, living more in a black or white area of pure existence, very little grey. These beings live and die, very quickly, all the time, without meaning....so what afterlife do they get? Or are we saying only artists, Americans, Europeans, or the rich are worthy of life after death? So its all selective? I think its just random.
The only question is why? And why is it so stable, our brains are remarkable little computers and really create the stability, question is if everything has a meaning, perhaps science is the study of the meaning, maybe the universe is a code. One can not deny that we know not what started it, what things were before, or how we can ever grasp the concept of forever.
Thus I conclude, there may not be life after death, but one can not rule out being born again, because before I was born, for infinity, I never expected to be born again, but I have absolutely no proof I lived before, without memory, living for living is pointless anyways. So if I was an ant, or will be an ant, its just as good as being dead. Seems death and infinity our the natural states of things.
Love: I often quote my anthropology professor to friends that Love is Economic. Well it is. The idea that there is this emotion that will make you happy, day in, day out, til you die, is foolish. The commitment is to prevent jealousy and those things we call feelings (Hormones) that get releases and to keep them balanced on in happy mode. Love is a bond that is economic to maintain a relationship to give people more stuff and security. The more a society has, I would gather, the more you find marriages come and go, plenty of stuff. The less, the more important that marriage is, the stronger the morals, because it means survival. Seem with families, people are more sustainable and safe in groups. This group, individual, bonding thing plays out all over again and again, in nations, sports, and between people. We form teams of friends, family, and lovers, to survive. Its not wonderful, its just something you have to do. But when it goes wrong as I know, it can hurt you very very bad. Maybe it is better not to have loved, and who cares what you lost?
Pointlessness: As I approach 30 I only have the following things in reality to look forward too.
1. I believe not in religion or love having disproved them. Because in reality neither has happened to me just disappointment and hurting others, which is not my intention so better I not have existed.
2. Happiness, is vague, rare, and not sustainable in this existence, we have floods, death, sickness, murder, and we are outnumbered, overpopulated, and killing ourselves, the rationalists can not win, so why bother? You won't impact your government, you have no control. So if you can not control things and you see a train heading for you and you have a gun in your hand, what do you do? Wait for the pain of the train or take the gun and go with the obvious rational truth, less pain same outcome.
3. As I age the family and friends I have, will not be added too. I will not make more true friends, I will not have anymore family you get family at the beginning of the game of life. Now you just watch them age, suffer and die. I have seen a few close relatives die, it was not wonderful, not the type of thing to put a bounce in your step.
4. Me: My mistakes in life, my attempt to be rational in an irrational world where evil does win (there are no referees) has only brought me being used and losses. I am not happy, nor does my money or career give me a sense of reward its just a mark of the mental and physical torture I been too and only looks good compared to the billions who starve. I can only look at dying young from the smoking I took up from stress, my bad eating habits from being picky and stressed, and from my horrendous drinking. So even if things did work out, I will die just like my uncle and aunt did when their lives started to go well again. Cancer and Diabetes run in my family, so when I do get a nice apartment and maybe get to relax, I am sure I will die, because that is what I seen. I didn't see angles, Mohamed or pretty fairies, I saw suffering, and death.
5. What is the point? Millions suffer and starve in North Korea and Zimbabwe because of one man or corrupt few. Yet thousands die quickly in earth quakes or Hunter S. blows his brains out. Yet nobody bats an eye, yet we spend all our time trying to protect dictators, deal with them, or feed and house rapists, murderers and burglars. Why not kill them, let more good live and help the millions? I think its ironic these people live til old age and are protected in life, but innocent people die by the hand of nature, maybe there is a god and maybe hes a fucking bastard like me.
I grew up in a rough area of Brooklyn. At each step I saw originally classes of people and the smart float to the top, the somewhat smart like me go up and down and struggle with a hard work ethic at times or a too smart for my own good self punishment in failure by not doing homework for example, and the majority act like animals, only to somewhat mature and drive buses, work in factories, or end up in jail most likely. After the complete torture of school, herded in away from your family, picked on by the larger more aggressive hominids, and then brain washed into the fairytale land of institutions and to come home to your TV that brainwashed you, you come out of that completely fucked up and ready to be shit on now by the world. Those kids you went to school with are just bigger, more aggressive and all over now in a giant free for all we call life.
I don't see anything good, we are running out of original things in the arts. Its all done, and now we will over populate, our climate is out of control, governments are now fully corrupt, and we sit here waiting for the next great war, plague, or disaster to hit any of us anytime, whether its terrorism or floods, it will happen, its just like waiting for it. I am sure on a ground floor apartment I will get robbed. my apartment was robbed twice as a kid, so yes it does actually happen. Or when I drive, I will run someone over or get crippled in an accident, read the news, it does actually happen every day. These things are Real. Reality is death or pain, with no justice. Expect rapists in the UK to be let out early, expect my manager who does no work but has tactics to kiss ass and look busy to rise to the top, and expect at no point to ever win. Unfortunately I see all this, I have lived all this, and now as I am about to turn 30, my maybe half way point, I think do I want another 30 years of this? I am bored, unemotional, hurt, beat down, and I have given up.
The only problem with all my brains I can find neither Pot to calm me or a gun to blow my brains out, so for now, I chug on, to hurt others, fail, be disappointed anytime I scrounge up some remaining energy to try and just wait for the next horrible thing to happen, I am sure its there, around the corner, when not waiting for a train or trudging at work, it happens on the days when I am off, want to have fun on a vacation, or randomly....its just over there, a death, an accident, another terrorist attack..the question is I can only hope I die, rather than get horrible hurt, in a vegetable state, made deaf or blinded, only to watch the criminal laugh, get away with it, and win. Because read the papers, in reality they do win, and finally, as I summarized above don't expect a shred of justice in the next life or later on, that is a trick to keep you going, keep you sedate and keep you working, so the few evil ones, like the Dick Cheney's and child like Gordon Brown's can keep on laughing, keep on eating and living the life while the billions of us nobodies, suffer, and die. I am only extra work and luck away from being like a child in India building a run down shack in the street with cement blocks, at least they don't know what I know, so i am jealous, jealous they are the ants, and I am the dog beat for pissing on the floor.
The only solace is death, because if this is what I would have to deal with for another hundred years then I really would crazy, which apparently I am anyways to boot.
I leave this blog to say, I have failed, I tried, I am sorry to all....
posted by Chuck Deggsy at 3:03 PM
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